On one rainy afternoon of last year as I continued to do my research in the laboratory, I thought of how nice it would be if I were home instead. Having a nice solitude moment with a book, a cup of tea, and some paper to write on. It felt like the right thing to do because the sky has that perfect grey tint to it. It makes me want to create stories.
At that time I did not know I would miss my student life. University was hard, and I did not like the subject I was studying. It was time and energy consuming; not to mention the depression of the haunting ‘what-ifs’. I only finished on time just so my dad won’t need to pay my tuition for another semester. Also, the chaos of never-ending laboratories for another six months isn’t appetizing at all.
Right now, after almost a year leaving university I remember those rainy afternoons where things would seem so much softer, more forgiving that it was. I remember the friends without whom I wouldn’t know the gift of friendship. People who used to be one laboratory away, or one floor away, or one classroom away. Now that we all have a life on our own, moments like that are irreplaceable. These days I have been wishing; wishing I had enjoyed my student life more; wishing I did not complain as much as I did; wishing I had appreciated those moments as it happened.
I’m typing this post while listening to the sound of the rain outside my window. I always find it amusing when something sets me back to a moment which would be gone otherwise. Things like perfume, fabric softener scent, rainy mornings, or the touch of the wind on your face. In my solitude today I have my books, tea, the perfect grey tinted sky, and everything else in between. One day when life gets busier, I would remember this moment as I sip on a hot tea inside a brightly lit room with five other people, discussing a project.
Lessons learned; moments are meant to be embraced, not rushed.